


Brothers (take on the world together)

by AngeNoir



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Anxiety, Body Dysphoria, Brothers, Dysphoria, Family Feels, First Dates, First Meetings, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Meet-Cute, Multi, Polyamory, Trans Character, Trans Male Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-31
Updated: 2018-09-03
Packaged: 2019-07-05 01:35:41
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 19,518
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15853551
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AngeNoir/pseuds/AngeNoir
Summary: Hanzo Shimada works at home, watches cooking shows, and generally doesn't really leave the house unless absolutely necessary. His brother is the social one; Genji loves to be with others, always disappears to talk to others, and Hanzo was fine with their dynamic.Until Genji asks him to run an errand, which pulls Hanzo into his orbit, Genji's friends' orbits, and especially, the orbit of one Jesse McCree.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Brothers (take on the world)](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/413163) by TiniestYokai. 



> My poor time management means I'm still trying to complete it; here's our first chapter, and here's hoping I can complete the rest later today!

Hanzo was in the middle of muttering his thoughts about the contestant’s choice of trying to make risotto in _thirty minutes_ \- who _does_ that, it _never_ works - when his cell vibrated on the table. He glanced over at it, debating whether to answer. Genji was the only one who had his number, but Genji was with his partners tonight. It was probably a telemarketer, though it was ridiculously late for one - almost 9 in the evening.

So. 9 in the evening was too late for a telemarketer. It was probably important, then.

The phone stopped ringing.

Not too important, then - he turned his attention back to the Chopped episode.

The phone began ringing again.

Hanzo’s heart jumped into his throat - only Genji had his number. Only Genji would call. Or someone who had Genji’s phone number - which would mean Genji was hurt.

Hanzo practically leapt off of the couch, tail stiff in fear, ears flat against his skull, and he snatched the phone up, ripping the charger away.

“Hello?” he asked, heart in his throat.

“Heyyyy, Hanzo!”

Hanzo nearly collapsed with relief when he heard Genji’s voice, and after that annoyance quickly rushed in - though that was unfair. His paranoia wasn’t Genji’s fault.

He was too long in replying, because immediately Genji’s voice became alarmed. “Hanzo? Are you alright?”

“I’m - I’m fine, Genji,” Hanzo said, forcing his voice not to waver or be anything but neutral.

“You sounded worried,” Genji pointed out.

Instead of dignifying that with a response, Hanzo simply remained silent.

After another fifteen seconds of silence, Genji cleared his throat. “Hey, are you… busy?”

Hanzo pulled the phone away from his face and looked at it, to confirm he was in fact on the phone with Genji’s number, and then brought the phone back to his ear. “Are you being kidnapped? Held for ransom? Do you need me to track your phone?”

“What? No! I just… okay, this started out weird. Hanzo, would you mind terribly doing me a favor? Running an… errand, in a way?”

Hanzo frowned. “What kind of errand?”

“Well… we ordered pizza to come to the farm, you know, Gabriel’s farm?”

Hanzo knew Gabriel from Genji’s words but not personally - Genji would talk about a _vampire_ , of all things, that ran a farm with his human assistant and various other employees. Hanzo knew Genji’s sex life was far more varied and… _colorful_ than Hanzo had ever had.

“I know _of_ Gabriel’s farm,” Hanzo replied, voice dry.

There was another fifteen seconds of silence, and then a soft mutter on the other side, like someone talking to Genji.

“Oh! Right, so we… we did order pizza, but we picked carry out, and… none of us… want to go get it?”

After a few seconds, Hanzo cleared his throat and replied, “Are you asking me, or them, this question?”

“Neither? I just - I don’t have the car, which you know, sorry, and the rest of us - well, could you do it?”

Genji’s voice had that wheedling, pleading tone, and Hanzo knew that Genji had been trying to get him to meet his partners for a while. This was probably just a ploy to get Hanzo to join a social outing when Hanzo _hated_ social outings, but at the same time… Hanzo had never known Genji to stay with the same partners for more than a month at a time. Three months was a milestone, and he wanted to see the people Genji had opened his heart to. Besides, picking up pizza and dropping it off required minimal personal contact. It should be easy.

Should.

“We just - we’re really comfortable, you know, and we are - you know what, it’s fine - ”

“Fine,” Hanzo said, cutting off Genji’s words.

There was a pause, and then Genji repeated hopefully, “Fine?”

“It is fine. I will do it,” Hanzo replied.

“Awesome!” Genji said, voice suddenly much more bouncy and enthused. “I’ll send you the address, and the address of the store.”

Hanzo did his best not to let his brain linger too long on the idea of traveling and walking into the store and everything - instead, he focused on just the steps of the task in front of him. Driving a car was not a problem, but ever since coming to America he realized dragonkin were practically nonexistent, and so the materials for the potion that would hide his draconic aspects was harder to make or acquire. On the whole, society was unaware of the mystical creatures that walked among them, and this being a much smaller city, very rural in comparison to their first apartment in downtown Los Angeles, people had no idea of his or Genji’s otherworldly traits. Genji, at least, had smaller horns and a slimmer tail - the T they took affected him less, or simply didn’t affect his horns and tail as much as it had affected Hanzo’s horns and tail - and it had been very quick and easy for Genji to land a job. Hanzo, not wanting to wear an oversized sweatshirt everywhere he went to hide his horns and his tail, had just stayed home and made it welcoming for Genji every time Genji came home. Now, he dug out the two-sizes-too-large sweatshirt and pulled it on, and then, for good measure, nabbed a baseball cap and pulled it awkwardly over his head, further masking his horns, before stepping outside the apartment door and making his way down to where their parking space was.

He managed to get to the pizza place - he was cautious with a new place and new directions, obsessively checking the GPS function every thirty seconds to a minute, but he got there before the pizza place closed. Now, of course, he had to actually walk _into_ the pizza place.

Gnawing on his lip, he eyed the door, and the hours. He technically had about twenty minutes before it closed at 10:00, but he should go in and get it.

He fiddled with the phone, realized he was just in his sleeping tank and sweats, and had a minor freakout in the driver’s seat. He didn’t want to get out of the car, and he nearly called Genji to tell him that he couldn’t do it.

But.

Twenty minutes to closing.

Hanzo clenched and unclenched his fist, slow and steady, forcing himself to take deep breaths, and then he opened the door of the car.

Just walk in. Get the pizza. Walk out. Perhaps pay tip. Genji should have paid tip, but Hanzo had no idea whether it was Genji specifically who had paid for the food or not.

Hell, Hanzo was just assuming that it was Genji’s name on the order. Gods above help him if it wasn’t Genji, because then he’d just have to guess who the order was under, and how to get it.

That in and of itself prompted another serious round of shaking, and he dug his nails into the palm of his hand. There wasn’t enough time left. He’d just walk in.

Just walk in.

His hand might have still been shaking a little when he grabbed the handle of the pizza place’s door tightly, and the chill of the air conditioning could explain away the shivers that started - if he was lucky, the sweatshirt hid them in any case. He walked up to the counter and barely managed to lift his eyes up to the chin of the person behind the counter.

“Can I help you?”

The voice was cheery and happy, and he tried to force his eyes to go higher, but it was hard. Clenching his fist against his side, he said quietly, “I’m here to pick up a pizza? Ah, a Genji Shimada placed the order.”

“Oh, yes, right here! It’s been getting cold, and it’s been paid for.”

Hanzo fumbled with his wallet, looking for the appropriate bill that would tip, and that cheery voice immediately said, “Oh, don’t worry about all that, the charge included a very generous tip, thank you!”

“Oh, well, very well,” Hanzo mumbled, taking the four boxes - with three smaller boxes stacked on top - and turned to the door. For a moment he nearly fumbled all the boxes, but, cheeks flushed red and embarrassment making his ears pin against his head, he finally nudged the door open and was out in the cool night air.

Breathing hard, as if he’d run a race, he placed the boxes on the hood of the car, and opened the back to place all the boxes inside. Once he closed the backseat door, he stood there a moment more, calming his breathing, before opening the door and sitting in the driver’s seat.

Genji was going to owe him _big_ for this, he grumbled to himself. Not only making him come to visit people, when he didn’t like visiting sprung upon him, but having to…

...to what? Go get the pizza? It was fine. It worked out fine. He’d never see them again, it wouldn’t matter that he nearly dropped everything, and hell, he couldn’t even remember what the person behind the counter looked like. It was fine.

Slowly, he talked himself down, talked his brain out of its panic, and then keyed in the directions on his phone to the ranch that Genji was at.

***

The drive itself wasn’t too far, though it was definitely out of town. Hanzo wasn’t as much of a shut-in as it seemed - he loved tending to the garden on their apartment balcony, really took the time to curate it and care for it. He ordered online the seeds, the pots. He also taught online - he taught Japanese, American Sign Language, Japanese Sign Language, and he also edited articles for various websites. He talked online with a lot of other people; his favorite was Sym and Amie, but there were quite a few others.

He just… didn’t do well in person. He never had. He was too aloof, too cold, too… something. Always had been. Genji was the extrovert, the person who went out and met others. Genji could do this.

He’d managed to keep from getting into too much of a panic, until he turned down the long drive of the ranch house, no light anywhere except for the porch, and parked behind three cars. Well, two cars and a huge truck that loomed in the darkness like a monolith. He’d never understood Americans with their fascination of hulking cars, except that Americans seemed to want to intimidate as many people as they could when they drove.

He got out of his _perfectly respectable-sized_ car and pulled the boxes out of the back. There had been some shifting as he had drove, so he restacked the boxes, checked everything over, and then stared at the small screen door in front of the warm oak wood. The house itself was… almost exactly what he expected when he heard the word ranch. Wide porch, fenced in, a field stretching out in the back, wooden beams.

It was too dark to really see anything, but he walked up the steps to the porch, walked past a rocking chair and a swing. It looked… homey. Nice. Genji certainly wasn’t living in squalor with his chosen lifemates.

At the door, though, he was faced with another problem - he couldn’t see a doorbell anywhere, so he had to knock, but to knock meant to shift all the pizzas and boxes onto one hand while opening up the screen door and then holding it open while he knocked.

After nearly dropping the pizzas before, he didn’t exactly trust himself - but the nearest flat surface (that was not the literal floor of the porch) was three steps behind him, a small table set up near a metal-and-canvas lawn chair.

Biting his lip, he shifted the weight of the pizza and propped open the door to knock. The first knock was hesitant, and he could hear noise in the house, see the warmth of the indoor lights shining behind blinds. There were people there. He just… wasn’t sure if anyone could hear his tentative knocking.

Heart going a million miles an hour, he knocked again, louder.

There was a shout, and then laughter, people yelling at each other, and Hanzo very nearly just dropped the pizza to leave when there was a growth of noise, a loud and rough voice getting closer, and then the door swung open to reveal a towering column of a woman, staring down at him.

“You don’t look like a pizza boy,” she said slowly.

“ _Pizza!_ ”

Hanzo would recognize that shout at any volume, but considering it was deafening - both he and the woman winced - he simply nodded towards the origin of the sound (he could even hear scrambling feet accompanying it). “That’s my brother,” he stated - the only explanation necessary, he felt.

Then the woman was pushed out of the way as Genji - nothing at all hiding his horns and tail, all of it displayed to the world - threw himself towards Hanzo, checking himself only in the last minute when he realized Hanzo was holding the pizzas Genji himself had asked Hanzo to bring. Coming to a faltering stop, Genji looked at Hanzo and then the pizza. “Let me take those, brother, and come in! You should come, come eat a piece of the pizza, meet my friends!”

“Oh, I - I hadn’t intended - ” Hanzo began, but Genji was already disappearing into the building, and the amazonian woman lifted an eyebrow at Hanzo.

After a few seconds, the woman sighed. “He was really excited about having you here, but I know that he kinda pulled this on you last minute. But, you know, we’re not that bad, and you don’t have to stay long. My name’s Fareeha, and I teach physical education at the school with Genji. You could just meet everyone, and then head out.”

Hanzo bit the inside of his cheek, and breathed in slowly. He was here, he may as well go through with it and see the people he only heard about in his brother’s stories. Besides, if he went home _without_ meeting anyone, Genji… wouldn’t be mad, but would be sad, and sometimes that was worse. It wasn’t a big thing, when he thought about it, and he’d get to know the people, see if they were treating his brother right. Genji had fallen in and out of friends, and Hanzo could remember quite a few of Genji’s previous friends overusing Genji’s generosity and kindness.

So he forced himself to put his hand out, offering it to the woman - Fareeha - so she could shake it. “I’m sure, then, that you know I am Hanzo,” he said quietly.

She waved her hand, stepping to the side and clearing the path for him to walk in. “You don’t have to shake my hand - it’s not necessary. Unless you want to?”

Since Hanzo most definitely didn’t want to shake anyone’s hand, he dropped his hand by his side and tentatively stepped in.

“It’ll seem like a lot, I will say, but you can always step back, step away, and collect yourself. No one wants to overwhelm you, I guarantee it, but some of us - myself normally included - can be a bit enthusiastic,” Fareeha said as she led the way through a small hallway. It wasn’t a very grand opening, honestly, considering how nice the house looked when driving up. A doorway opening out into a hallway that branched to either side - it wasn’t an auspicious start. However, walking down to the right, after a few seconds the hallway suddenly disappeared and revealed a large living space, huge couches and a low table on a ridiculously plush-looking carpet. There were various bodies everywhere, and all looked up when Fareeha led Hanzo into the room, to the point where Hanzo considered turning around and going back down the hallway.

“Everyone, this is my brother, Hanzo, the person kind enough to go get our pizzas for us!” Genji said, setting the boxes down. “Hanzo, the two over there in the corner of the couch are Jack and Gabriel; Gabriel owns this place, stays in the house during the day, and Jack takes care of the animals and the small garden in the back. On the ground here, sitting near me, is Lucio and Hana - Hana has one of the other sections of kindergarten at my school and Lucio works here on the farm with Jack and Gabriel, and then over on the opposite side of the couch is Satya and Sombra; Satya has a big fancy job at an accounting company and Sombra works in a cybersecurity firm that works with that accounting company. Lena and Jesse were in the kitchen, getting some sodas for everyone - there they are!”

Hanzo had been carefully trying to keep everyone’s name in his head, considering and memorizing to the best of his ability, but with the sudden exclamation he turned to see that the living area had a large kitchen set behind the living area - probably, if the wall of that closed-off hallway had been removed, he would have been able to stare right into the kitchen first thing - and there was a short person hopping forward, seeming to have boundless energy as she chattered with the tall, handsome person wearing a huge, wide-brimmed cowboy hat.

“Oh, hey, Genji, is this your brother? So handsome! You never told me that he had long hair; looks much better than your spiky grass!” the short, peppy one said, dumping the sodas cans in their arms onto the table next to the pizza. “Hello, love, my name’s Lena, but you can call me Tracer - everyone else does!”

Hanzo, a bit wide-eyed and starting to get overwhelmed, cut his eyes over to Genji, who wasn’t even looking up - his brother had paper plates out, and was dividing out pizza to different people sitting around. Fareeha had moved forward to flop down on the couch between the two couples.

(At least, Hanzo had taken them for couples, with how the one called Gabriel was spread out and Jack was resting between Gabriel’s hips, back to Gabriel’s chest, and the way that Satya was calmly playing with Sombra’s hair while the other sprawled over most of the sofa, head in Satya’s lap. Perhaps they weren’t. He didn’t have enough information to know.)

The other person - in the huge cowboy hat, and didn’t that look ridiculous indoors - passed the sodas down to Jack instead of walking around the sofa and setting them down, as Lena - as Tracer - had done. Then he walked behind the couch to where Hanzo was, brown eyes warm and soft and brown hair shaggy around his face.

“You alright there, darlin’?” he drawled, voice soft. “Need ta step back?”

Slowly, Hanzo gave a minute shake of his head.

“D’ya wanna come sit down? Th’ rocking chair’s empty, and there’s a mat on the ground next to Genji.”

Hanzo glanced at the room. “I don’t… know anyone,” he murmured, trying to find a way to delicately extricate himself from having to sit down next to someone he didn’t know - or sit by his brother and then sit awkwardly quiet while he waited for his brother to notice him and give him someone to talk to.

“Well, I’m sittin’ in the kitchen back there, see?”

Hanzo turned to look where Jesse was pointing, at the kitchen area set behind the living area. It was pretty open concept, except for that one long wall that made the hallway he had walked down, which meant there was a large island with a few bar stools set at it, looking out at the living area.

The seats would be removed without being _too_ removed, and so Hanzo nodded.

“Let me nab us some pizza, and we can sit back there. They’re playing some trivia game on the TV there, but I’m not allowed to play TV on account a’ sore losers.”

“You _cheat_ !” the one called - Sonia? Sombra - shouted from where she was sprawled, her ankle knocking into Jack’s knee. “You cheat and you’re _weird_.”

Hanzo looked down at Sombra, and then over at Jesse, who was grabbing quite a few slices of pizza on a thin ceramic plate. He was tempted to ask what that meant, but he didn’t feel like he knew them well enough to interject. Instead, hesitantly, he began to drift back towards the kitchen area.

It was better lit there, though that didn’t help his stress headache, and it was much quieter; the living area was full of low conversations between the people there. The flatscreen spread over the fireplace’s mantel was showing some electronic trivia game, where a yellow team was soundly trouncing a green and pink team.

Hanzo could guess Genji was on the green team - he loved the color, and his hair often had highlights of green (or, memorably five months ago, _entirely_ green).

When he took one of the stools, perched on it so he was half-ready to turn and leave, Jesse came back over and placed the plate on the middle of the island so Hanzo could easily reach it while he sat down - not directly next to Hanzo, but two stools away. A respectable distance, and one Hanzo appreciated.

“So, you’re Genji’s brother?” Jesse asked.

Hanzo shifted in his seat. “So you’re the cowboy that helps take care of the cattle here on Jack and Gabriel’s farm?”

Very visibly, Jesse preened. “You know me?”

The ridiculousness of the gesture made Hanzo laugh, and went some ways to soothing his nerves. “Genji talks about all of you. I may only be just putting names to faces, but I’ve heard about all of you in some way or another.”

“G’wan, what do you know about me?” Jesse said, leaning forward a little and propping his chin up on his hand.

Hanzo tentatively pulled a small piece of pizza off the plate and nibbled on the tip. “I know you are a werewolf, even if you don’t tell others. I know you like working outside, and you are an employee of the vampire. I know you work with Lucio and Lena here on the farm, though you handle the animals for the slaughterhouse and breeding, and they handle the racehorses.”

With a lot whistle, Jesse rubbed the back of his neck. “You certainly know a lot about me. Genji must talk about us a lot?”

Hanzo simply nodded, taking a slightly bigger piece of pizza delicately, trying to keep the hood of his sweatshirt from getting soiled.

“Well, I can’t do near as well as you,” Jesse admitted, a bit shamefacedly. “I mean, Genji talked about his brother who teaches online, who writes a bit, and who can cook like the devil himself, but he certainly never talked about your beautiful eyes or your delicate hands.”

Hanzo’s mouth very nearly dropped open in surprise, but before he could think of anything he could possibly say to that, Genji was suddenly at his arm.

“I know you probably just want to leave, _nii-san_. If you give me maybe twenty more minutes - they’re beating us pretty badly - we can eat and then we can drive back together? If you want to leave right away, however, Jesse can drive me back, or I can have Lucio drop me off at the apartment.”

Hanzo hesitated. On the one hand, he was pretty sure he’d only get more awkward over time, but on the other, he didn’t want to have to have his brother ask for a ride, not when Hanzo was there, and twenty minutes wasn’t that long, comparatively speaking. “I can wait. Your friend Jesse here was speaking with me very generously.”

“We don’t let him play because even when he plays alone, he still beats everyone with his weird niche knowledge,” Genji said, leaning in to bump his hip against Jesse’s bar stool. “So he just watched us try to beat Satya and Sombra. They’re close to being banned too, but at least _they_ lose every once in a while.”

“We’re doing alright here,” Jesse added in, smiling widely.

Genji turned back to Hanzo, and murmured in Japanese, “ _Is it too much? I wanted to meet my friends, and it seemed convenient to get it done now, after so many months, but I didn’t consult you first._ ”

“ _It’s alright_ ,” Hanzo replied in kind, voice low.

“ _You’re going to overheat in that sweatshirt, though. All of the people in the room know of the supernatural world; you won’t frighten anyone._ ” Genji placed a can of soda next to Hanzo. “If you want,” he added on in English. “No pressure.”

Hanzo felt the tips of his ears quiver and lie flat in embarrassment, and his cheeks heated up. Ducking his face, he murmured, “ _I don’t know. Even if everyone here knows of the otherkind, dragonkin are… new. And I look… more than you._ ”

“ _They thought it was adorable,_ ” Genji teased, draping himself on Hanzo’s shoulders and nuzzling at his neck. “ _It’ll be fine, you’ll see. But if you don’t want, don’t worry._ ”

Squeezing Hanzo tight, Genji slipped back to the game, which was not exactly amiable and friendly, but it definitely wasn’t to-the-death, as competitions could sometimes turn.

Jesse stared at Hanzo, face open and soft. Hanzo felt his cheeks darken even further, and he looked away. “What?” Hanzo asked.

“Your voice is amazing,” Jesse said frankly. “Damn, honey. I would love to talk to you more, but if you’re not feeling like it, you can head on out. I can take care a’ myself; I just watch them make fools of themselves over there.”

Hanzo glanced over at the screen, was proclaiming the category ‘2010s Number One Hits’ and where Jack and Hana were arguing fiercely, pointing fingers and gesturing wildly. With a small chuckle, he shook his head. “I don’t mind. It’s alright,” he repeated, since this was very comfortable - watching was more than enough for him, and it meant people didn’t have to interact with him all that much, if their focus was elsewhere.

“So, you know I’m a werewolf, and I know you’re dragonkin like Genji. I also know you like the cooking shows that have people makin’ food really fast in a time limit for judges,” Jesse began, settling back against the island and chewing thoughtfully on his pizza. “You like cooking?”

“It is a hobby of mine,” Hanzo said carefully. When there was simply an expectant pause, Hanzo elaborated, “I like watching the shows. I like to pretend I would know what to do in their shoes. There is always a lot of… mmm. Drama, if you will, but with nothing truly at stake. If that makes sense. I can take a step back from it in my mind and tell myself that it is just cooking, just a show about people being good chefs, and even if they do not win, they will still return back to jobs and to being good chefs.”

Jesse grinned. “Well, Jack likes to sneak the odd episode of Kids Baking Championship in, even if Gabriel prefers those fashion design and art design shows. I’ve watched enough to enjoy it, so I think I understand what you’re getting at.”

Shifting on his stool to see Jesse more fully, Hanzo asked, “And you? Do you watch anything for fun?”

Jesse tilted his head back, the hat looking like it would fall off the back of his head any minute, and hummed quietly. “Not really. Well - that’s a lie. I like those old Westerns. The really, really, _really_ old ones. Good, bad, doesn’t matter. I like the feel of it, and the idea of how open the world was, then. How much _more_ there was, it seemed, of space and empty sky. I like runnin’ around, just the feel of the land beneath my paws. I was a bit of a wanderer, you know, in my youth. Traveled around a lot, no real pack to my name. So I think that’s where the like for those old Westerns came in.” He shook his head, and Hanzo watched, fascinated, as the hat slipped a little on that shaggy brown hair but never actually fell off. “I do a lotta outdoors stuff. I’m in charge of the cattle, getting them out to eat, bringing them back in, but also the accounts and stuff for the house and the ranch. Jack and Lena, they take care of the racing part of it, and sometimes they travel, win a few purses of money for the ranch. Not big money, not those big races you might see on the television, but there’s more’n a few local races with respectable prizes.”

“And you? Do you ride the horses as well?” Hanzo pressed, not even noticing he’d polished off the piece of pizza.

Jesse laughed, white teeth flashing behind dark skin, and Hanzo felt something flutter in his chest at the sight. “Oh, gods above, no!” he chuckled. “No, I tried - my biggest dream had been to ride, when I was a young pup - but I smell too much wolf. After about the sixth time I went ass over tits from being thrown, I gave up and just did without. Not like it hinders me any. ‘Sides, the horses we got ain’t the big draft ones, that could hold me. I’m a big guy, and those racers are built like sticks.”

Hanzo smiled, propping his chin on his hand and not really noticing that the hood of the hoodie had slipped down further than he normally had it up. “Six times?” he asked.

“I’m a mite stubborn,” Jesse said sheepishly. “I was sure I could acclimate the horse t’my scent. The horse disagreed.”

Hanzo couldn’t stop from laughing, and he pushed back some of his hair to tuck it behind his ear. “You must have been an interesting child,” he chuckled. “Certainly a good storyteller. I was much more quiet, and reserved.”

“Way Genji tells it, you’re ten feet tall and fiercer’n a yellowjacket,” Jesse replied, voice teasing. “He loves to talk about that time you an’ he thought there was a monster hidin’ in the koi pond.”

Hanzo’s cheeks flushed bright red, and he cringed. “He still tells that story?” he asked in embarrassment.

“To anyone who’ll listen,” Jesse confimed.

Hanzo glanced over at the living room, where Genji was currently heatedly arguing with his teammates in a whispered conversation, and fondness tugged at his chest. His brother had been certain there was something living in the bottom of the koi pond when they were young children, and after sniffing out a strange scent near it, Hanzo had also decided it was time to find out whatever was hiding and chse it into the open. Long story short, they had come home, covered in mud and dripping wet, more than a few koi fish traumatized, and covered in scratches from a fox that had decided to den for a short while by the rushes because it was hurt - the source of the strange smell after all.

Genji did love to tell that story, even if it was embarrassing.

“Are you a fan of Pokemon?” Jesse asked.

Jerking his attention back from Genji, Hanzo felt his cheeks blush again. “Ah - yes. Why do you ask?”

“Yer hoodie - that’s the little fox character?” Jesse clarified, gesturing at the design on the hoodie.

Oh. Now that his attention was drawn to it, Hanzo realized he’d pulled the hoodie that had evee’s many evolutions on the front, and while it was his favorite, and he wore it anytime he had to leave the house… he liked it because it was warm, thick, and comfy. Much too warm and thick for the house, which might have had an AC running but probably did not, or at least, not high. Worrying at his lip, he plucked at the hoodie that came down low, to mid-thigh to hide the tail he kept curled around his waist, and that was loose enough to hide his body from any curious eyes. “I - most people know nothing about the supernatural world. And the potion we used to hide ourselves is very expensive; I generally let Genji use it, in his job at the school.”

“If y’ just wanna keep yer otherness hidden, Sombra there is a pretty decent hedgewitch; great at illusion spells. She can magic one up fer ya, put it on a necklace or ring or some such thing, an’ y’won’t have ta worry about being seen,” Jesse offered.

Hanzo hesitated a long, long moment. That would be… a relief, to know that no one would see anything other than who he wanted them to see, not having to worry about humans prying into his business or questioning his appearance. “She would not mind?”

“I can call ‘er over here; her turn’s not for a bit, not until Genji’s team get off their ass and answer, and then Jack and Gabriel answer their own question,” Jesse replied, voice easy.

Hanzo glanced at the couch, and then back at Jesse. Everyone seemed… very at ease. Hanzo had been here almost fifteen minutes now, and he was sweating - lightly, but still. Sweating.

He could see the slanted tilt of Satya’s eyes, the pointed tips of her ears. He could see the slit eyes on Hana. He could see fangs, peeking out of Gabriel’s lip, and could see the puncture wounds on Jack’s neck and collarbone.

He could see his own brother, Genji, moving with ease with his horns and his tail on display.

Shakily, he drew a deep breath, and slid the hood off his head. Then he pulled the baseball cap off, setting it down and staring at the nondescript black and grey hat. He was hot. He did want to be comfortable, and these were Genji’s friends. These were people he should trust, and who shouldn’t judge him.

It was also a hoodie, which meant it would be ridiculous and awkward to get off.

But he wanted to try. He liked talking with Jesse. The people here weren’t invasive, they respected him, respected his brother. He could do this.

Wriggling, he extracted himself from the hoodie, and he only had his binder underneath but the rush of cool air was heaven over his skin. He might look reptilian, with his tail - twitching now in the air - and the scales on his elbows, shoulders, the back of his neck, and down his spine, but he ran hot as dragonkin and it was a relief not to be sitting in that humid, damp air anymore.

Jesse let out a whistle, and Hanzo prepared for a comment, any comment.

“That’s a heckuva beautiful shade a’ nail polish,” Jesse murmured. “It looks like the ocean, or a deep sunset. Matches your scales beautifully.”

Hanzo’s cheeks went a deep red, and he had to look away, nervously folding the hoodie and fussing with the ends and edges to make it neat. “Well…” he said slowly, hoping his voice stayed steady, “I… I really liked the hat. You have. It looks… nice.”

He sounded like a moron, and could have pinched himself in frustration.

Next to him, Jesse leaned back, a hand going to the back of his neck. “Aww, shucks, that’s real sweet of you to say. All’a these naysayers always make fun o’ it.”

“It suits you. You look… charming.”

They sat in silence for a few beats, before Jesse turned back to Hanzo. “Hey - I’m really glad you agreed to come tonight. You’re just - I think you’re pretty amazing, and maybe it’s just me, but I think something clicked, and I’d like to maybe, take you out for a cup of coffee sometime?”

Hanzo felt like he was going to have a heart attack.

“If you want! No pressure, o’course. We could just be friends, going out to eat or somethin’,” Jesse said hastily.

Realizing that Jesse was probably nervous - he wasn’t looking directly at Jesse, dying of embarrassment as he was - Hanzo tentatively put up a hand. “W-wait,” he said quietly, breathing in slowly.

Jesse paused next to him, almost frozen in his movement, and Hanzo breathed out. “I don’t - I don’t go out. Much. Not around… humans. Normal people. I am not… sure.”

In the background, there was some loud noise - not cheering, but clear noises of happiness, and some anger there - but Jesse leaned in, the heat of his body somehow attractive even after Hanzo had been hot and wanted some cool air. “We don’t gotta go out, then? I can come to your place, or you could come over ta mine? We could go out for a picnic. We could… do a lotta things? If you wanna.”

“That sounds… good,” Hanzo said softly.

Standing up, Jesse began fumbling in his pockets until he pulled out an old-looking phone. “You wanna put your number in my phone? Or put my number in yours?”

A bit nervously, Hanzo reached out and took the phone, his fingertips brushing against Jesse’s palm.

Genji came back, cheeks flushed - angry, but not hopping mad, so not too bad - and so Hanzo stood up, setting the hoodie on the island so he could hand back the phone to Jesse. As Jesse took the phone, he paused and stood up as well. “Can I - hold your hand?”

After a few seconds, Hanzo offered his hand to Jesse.

Dramatically, Jesse cupped Hanzo’s elbow and took his hand, dropping his mouth to it and just brushing his lips against the back of Hanzo’s hand. “It was a pleasure meeting you, Hanzo Shimada. I’m glad you spent time with me here and kept me company since these sore losers keep me from playing the game.”

His cheeks had never gone so red, so often, since Hanzo could remember. As it was, he gripped at his abdomen, tail flicking back and forth nervously. “O-oh! I - it was my pleasure. I liked it. Very much.”

Not sure what else to say, how else to respond, he grabbed at the hoodie and baseball cap and quick-walked out of the house and outside.

Once outside, he stopped in the darkness, crushed hands (and hoodie, and cap) to his face, and let out a high-pitched whine. He just _left_ . Turned and _left_.

He was _so bad at this_.

A hand came down and hovered over his shoulder. When he looked, pulling his hands down so he could peer over the material of his hoodie, Genji was standing there, eyes dancing and smile fond. “Good night?”

Hanzo let out another high-pitched sigh, squinching his eyes shut.

Genji’s hand came down on his shoulder, rubbing at the skin and strap, and as Hanzo pulled in a deep, shuddering breath, Genji murmured, “ _I hope you liked them. I - they’re important to me._ ”

“ _They seem like good people,_ ” Hanzo replied, shifting his arms so that the hoodie - which had been falling when he had held his hands to his face - wouldn’t fall to the ground. “ _Jesse… said that he could make a pendant or necklace or something, that would make an illusion. For my… horns. Myself._ ”

Hand sliding from Hanzo’s shoulder to Hanzo’s back, Genji slowly rubbed his hand in a circle as he made an indecisive sound. “ _You do not need to, but yes, Sombra is very good at illusions. She can walk into the room without anyone knowing she’s there. Do you want? I can ask._ ”

Hanzo nodded. “ _And…_ ” He trailed off, the concept so foreign, he wasn’t actually sure it applied to him.

But Genji knew his brother, and was patient, silent and waiting as they slowly made their way over to their car. Finally, standing outside the car, shaking his head in surprise and disbelief, Hanzo murmured, “ _I think I have a date._ ”

***

“I don’t know what to do.”

Genji lifted his head, glowering up at Hanzo. They had ended up in Hanzo’s room again, but when Hanzo had woken up an hour ago, he’d had a text from Jesse who’d offered to stop by the apartment, drive Hanzo out of the city and into the country for a picnic. Hanzo had, without thinking, replied that he’d love to - because he _would_ love to, in the abstract - and then promptly freaked out and had gone digging through his closet for something slightly interesting. His clothes were all a bit ill-fitting; the T he was taking was causing his pecs and his muscles to bulk up, so he would need to eventually buy new clothes.

But it meant he had nothing _nice_ to wear. He’d even gone over to Genji’s room, even though Hanzo had bulked up more than Genji, to see if there was anything he could wear.

He didn’t know what to _do_. Genji was the one that had gone on many dates, and knew what to do or how to behave. Hanzo had… well, when Hanzo had been in college, he’d gone on a few dates, but once he left college and really drawn into himself, he hadn’t. It had easily been four to five years since his last relationship.

“I’m _tired,_ ” Genji whined. “Let me sleep.”

“You’re always sleepy,” Hanzo grumbled, sitting down on the low bed and staring blankly at the closet.

With a sigh, Genji wiggled around and then flopped his body against Hanzo’s back. “Hanzo, he can’t be coming right this minute, is he? What time is he coming?”

“At three in the afternoon,” Hanzo mumbled, pinching the bridge of his nose.

Mumbling under his breath - Hanzo could slightly understand words here or there, but nothing concrete or clear - Genji nosed at the back of Hanzo’s neck. “It’s not even nine in the morning yet. Lie down here, _nii-san_. Let’s sleep a little more. It was a late night last night. Saturday’s the only night I can really relax and sleep in.”

Breathing in a heavy sigh, Hanzo conceded. He didn’t know what to do, and Genji was tired - it wouldn’t be fair to wake him up right now.

Genji must have read his capitulation in the tension in his shoulders, because he tugged Hanzo backwards, whining, “Lie down. I only get one day in the week to sleep in with my favorite _nii-san_ and I want my time.”

“I’m your _only_ brother,” Hanzo sighed, lying down at his brother’s urging. Immediately, Genji wiggled and flopped on top of Hanzo’s chest, knocking his smaller antlers into Hanzo’s bigger ones. The affectionate gesture Hanzo smile, and he rubbed his antlers against Genji’s in response, shifting so he could wrap an arm around Genji’s shoulders. “Did you set the thermostat to 68 again?” he murmured, Genji’s heat tugging at his restless mind and calming down the spiraling thoughts.

Genji nodded, yawning. “Sleeping is better when it’s cold outside the bed,” he mumbled. “You liked my friends, right, Hanzo?”

Hanzo thought back to his impressions of them, the warmth he saw, the way people accepted him and didn’t press him, and he smiled. “I like them, Genji.”

With a hum, Genji shifted again on top of him, and then shifted again. After a few minutes, he tilted his head up at Hanzo, one eye squinted open and a mock scowl on his face. “I can’t go back to sleep now.”

“It _is_ only twenty minutes or so to nine,” Hanzo laughed, the last of his tension easing out of his body. “We could wake up and I could make you some really nice fish and rice.”

“Mmm. Sounds yummy. Alright, I guess. It’s my _one day_ to sleep in with my _dearest brother_ but I guess I could wake up early and eat your food instead,” Genji sighed, putting on a dramatic flair as he sat up and stretched. “We should probably turn off the thermostat.”

Breakfast on the weekend was actually a rare affair - breakfast in _general_ was a rare affair. Genji, for all that he had never been late to school in all his career, still was rushing around like a madman in the morning, drinking the potion that would hide his appearance from others and nabbing, at best, a small pastry and a cup of coffee. On the weekend, Genji slept in, or slept over with one of his lovers. So it was a nice treat, to be able to sit at the small table across from Genji, his brother chattering about little James or Leanna, about what trouble Emily had gotten into _this_ time, and simply eat a fulfilling and hot meal.

When he was done, Genji put his bowl and chopsticks down, and, interlocking his fingers, propped his chin up on his hands and grinned like the cheshire cat. “So, you and Jesse seemed to have gotten along very well last night.”

Hanzo felt his cheeks flush and he looked down at his rice. “He… is very pleasing to the eye. And charming. He was kind, and asked me honest questions, and answered mine in return.”

“I’ve never seen you fall so quickly into infatuation! Maybe even love,” Genji teased gently. “You could do worse than Jesse. He’s very patient and kind, and maybe you can visit him, get out more! You know you need to leave the apartment sometime. You sometimes go grocery shopping, but even then you don’t really interact with anyone. You have like two friends online.”

“I get it, Genji,” Hanzo mumbled.

Fondly, Genji kicked under the table, hitting at Hanzo’s legs. “I’m just worried. But this will be good. I am very happy, you have no idea how much.”

Licking his lips, Hanzo looked up at Genji, nervous and knowing he was opening himself up to a lot of teasing. “I… do not know how people date, here. What I should do so that… what people like to do when they date. I need to know, so that I can do this right.”

With a frown, Genji tilted his head. “Hmm. I dunno what people here date like, but I love going to the skate park with Lucio, going out to go dancing at different places with both Lucio and Jack and Gabriel. Ooh, Jack and Gabriel love to go on wine tastings or art classes, or maybe you could go on a romantic cruise?”

Skating, dancing, and a cruise. Nothing Hanzo would have loved, but obviously, Hanzo hadn’t been on a date for a while, so perhaps he just was out of touch with what people liked to do. So he nodded, keeping in mind that he wanted to do things Jesse would like to do. “I will try. Though he is picking what we will do today, so maybe this will give me an idea of what to do.”

***

Dressed in his hoodie, baseball cap, and loose sweats, Hanzo felt like a slob next to Jesse, who was wearing well-worn jeans that fit him like a glove and a plaid t-shirt that showed off powerful arms, that cowboy hat still sitting jauntily on messy brown hair. Still, Jesse lit up when he saw Hanzo open the door, and he eagerly chattered about one of his cows that was going to calve soon, leading Hanzo out of the apartment building and into a beat-up old truck.

Hanzo bit his lip at the almost perfect caricature of a cowboy, and he managed to wholly forget about other people around him the entire time. It helped that Jesse pointed the truck out of town, towards rolling country hills, and kept up easy talk about cooking shows, about what Hanzo liked to write about, about daily life on the farm, about how Lucio - who Hanzo knew about generally, but now he knew how Lucio was always positive, always peppy, always smiling, and how much that seemed to irritate Gabriel.

It was easy to talk to Jesse. He never put any pressure on Hanzo to participate, but left open-ended questions for Hanzo to step in and speak up should Hanzo want to.

They ended up driving off the road, down a small dirt trail, and coming to a stop under a copse of trees. In the distance, there was a stream burbling, and as Jesse got out he said easily, “This is all private property; ain’t no one gonna be comin’ through ‘ere, so if you wanna take your hoodie off and maybe even dip in the stream a bit, we can.”

Hanzo looked around. Indeed, the area was completely deserted beyond the sounds of insects and birds, the odd scuffle in the underbrush from rabbits or other small creatures. Smiling, he easily pulled off the hat and hoodie, leaving them on the passenger seat, before clambering out of the truck to help Jesse set up. There was a really nice patterned blanket, an honest-to-goodness wicker basket, and a few towels - clearly, Jesse intended to swim, and Hanzo was both terrified and excited. He had loved swimming as a child, loved the feel of water against his skin, the way the world and light looked different under water, and his dragon side had absolutely adored the environment. As he grew older, and became more and more out of touch with his body, his image more and more jarring to see, he stopped doing so, and then when he and Genji had moved to the states, every pool seemed to be public, open to anyone, and there was no way Hanzo was comfortable with that.

Maybe he would swim. He was… not that comfortable, with his upper half. At all. It could make him dizzy and nervous and nauseated. But maybe he could swim _with_ it on… strip down to his boxers and feel the water against him.

He was distracted with these thoughts, so he didn’t even notice everything was set up until Jesse was leaning close - not touching, but moving into Hanzo’s orbit. When Hanzo lifted his face, Jesse looked anxious.

“If it’s not something you like, you don’t have to - ”

Hanzo interrupted Jesse, shaking his head. “No, no - I - I like this. Very much. This was a wonderful idea. I was just - thinking.”

Jesse calmed immediately, his whole body perking up and eyes light and joyous. “Great! Alright, so I know you guys like fish, so I got somma that, an’ I also have some ribs, because you can’t really have a picnic without ribs. And pie. I got a mean apple pie I make - even Gabriel eats it, and he barely eats any human food anymore.”

The meal was absolutely delicious (even if Jesse’s idea of ‘fish’ was ‘tuna fish sandwiches’) and Hanzo nearly ate half the pie by himself, his sweet tooth was that strong. As it was, between the two of them they finished off the deviled eggs, the grilled cheese sandwiches, the ribs, the roasted corn, and most of the pie.

Then Jesse moved to the water.

“Aren’t… are you. Shouldn’t we wait… for an hour? To swim?” Hanzo asked tentatively.

“Well, I won’t swim yet,” Jesse said. “Just was gonna go about catching me some frogs.”

Hanzo crinkled his nose. “You eat frogs?”

Jesse started laughing, big, happy laughs that somehow didn’t make Hanzo feel stupid or silly. “No, haven’t you ever just caught frogs ta catch ‘em? It’s fun to do, and we’re just gonna let ‘em go afterwards.”

Not quite sure what the appeal was, Hanzo rolled up his sweatpants and waded into the water, watching Jesse more than the creatures at his feet.

At least, until Jesse suddenly hopped forward like a frog himself, going headfirst into the water and coming up empty-handed. The sudden motion made a wave splash up and covered Jesse head to toe in water.

“Almost got ‘im!” Jesse said gleefully.

Now, Hanzo paid more attention to the eddies and creatures at his feet, the sand being kicked up. He darted his hand forward but the frog was faster, slipping away. Another frog croaked, and he whirled, just in time to watch it disappear.

He was smarter than a frog. He could catch one.

Determined, now, he lunged forward, and missed. Another huge splash came from his side, and he turned to see Jesse had again thrown himself forward and came up with a huge bullfrog.

“That’s enormous!” Hanzo said in surprise.

“Think that’s th’ only reason I caught it, t’be honest,” Jesse laughed easily. “C’mon, let’s see if we can find ‘im a friend.”

Before Hanzo noticed, the sun was slanting shadows long across the water, and Jesse was sighing. He was fully wet, and to be fair Hanzo was practically as wet, though not as fully as Jesse himself. He’d gone down into the stream more than once to try and catch a slippery frog that he was _sure_ he could catch, and he’d completely lost track of the time.

As they walked back, the heat of the afternoon drying Hanzo’s skin, if not clothes, and Jesse handed him a towel, Hanzo looked at Jesse and knew that he wanted this to continue.

If only he could not fuck up.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this is where the story earns its explicit rating! genji is way more sexually active than hanzo lol

Genji clicked the lock on the car as he stood on the porch of Gabe’s ranch house, fumbling in his pockets for the house keys. This weekend was Gabe’s and Jack’s weekend; next weekend, he’d spend with Lucio, in Lucio’s apartment in the city.

Well, Saturdays he normally spent sleeping in with his brother and chilling at home, but ever since Jesse came into Hanzo’s life, Hanzo had been venturing out more and more.

It really cheered Genji - he’d always been worried about Hanzo, been terrified that Hanzo would never break out of his shell and was hiding himself away. He wanted his brother happy, and as much as Hanzo always said that he liked staying home, liked just cooking and making the apartment neat and nice, typing his articles online, Genji couldn’t really see Hanzo enjoying that. When they had moved, at first, Hanzo had just completed his schooling and Genji was starting his own college education. Hanzo had been working at some business, a steady nine to five job that paid for their apartment and let Genji go to school without worrying about paying for anything. When Genji had graduated and entered the workforce, it had happened at an opportune time - the company Hanzo had been at had just gone through massive lay-offs due to some embezzlement and fraud done by a member of the board. Of course, even though the board member had been the center of the scandal, they had still managed to be ‘fired’ with a generous severance package. Hanzo and his fellow workmates were not as lucky. Oh, they got a severance package, enough to support Hanzo and Genji until Genji got hired, but it had been very tight for quite a few months.

Then Genji met Jack in that club, had gone home with him and Gabe, had met  _ Lucio _ , had met this… this amazing family. And yet Hanzo stayed in the apartment, never leaving. It had started simply, Hanzo pointing out that the potion to conceal their draconic features was expensive to create, and if anyone needed it, it was Genji. Genji had known it was an excuse, that Hanzo would fall into a rut and become safe, comfortable, and lonely. But money  _ had _ been tight, and getting enough of certain ingredients  _ had _ been an issue. Genji had let it slide. Plus, Hanzo had always been more of a homebody, had always loved being in the house more than out at parties, so it was easy for Genji to make excuses, to say that Hanzo preferred it.

But as Genji spent time with his friends, had gone to parties, had gained his boyfriends and stayed with them on weekends, he realized Hanzo was… well, not left behind, not really, but definitely left out. Genji began trying to subtly get Hanzo introduced to his friends, get Hanzo to come to a small get-together here, a party there. Until that one night, where either Hanzo had been receptive enough, or worn down enough, that he’d given in and agreed to help Genji out.

Now, Hanzo had been on three dates in the past five weeks - more times he’d been out than Genji could remember, at least since his work had ended. Definitely more times for pleasure Genji could ever remember, at least consecutively, even taking into consideration when Genji could remember their childhood years.

Finally, he managed to fumble the keys out from under all the other miscellaneous shit he had in his pockets (two rocks Isabelle had given him, his classroom keys, his ID card, the wrapper to his gum that he chewed to make his breath smell better after he drank his morning coffee) and got the key into the door. Pushing open the heavy wood, he called out, “Gabe? Gabe, you around?”

It was midday Saturday, and Hanzo had gone out with Jesse again. The dates had been going… well, Genji would like to say that they were going well, but to be quite honest, Hanzo’s stories were littered with embarrassment. When they’d gone skating, Hanzo hadn’t ever used skates before and so had fallen and managed to bust open his lip, bleeding a worrying enough amount that Jesse had taken Hanzo back home. The next date, Jesse had taken Hanzo out - to eat, Genji had gathered, but they hadn’t even really made it into the restaurant; Hanzo’s anxiety stopped them at the door. They’d ended up going to pick up food through a drive-through, going to a drive-in movie and eating there.

It worried Genji, a little. He worried that Hanzo would give up, would decide it wasn’t working. But it seemed as if maybe Hanzo really wanted the relationship to work out; even though most, if not all, of Hanzo’s stories had some form of mishap or tragedy, he still made plans to go out with Jesse, still went.

“I’m in the kitchen!”

Genji dropped his messenger bag against the table just inside the front door, made his way right down the hallway into the wide open living area and kitchen. All the windows were closed, shuttered, to keep the sunlight from trickling into the house. Gabe was a vampire, a blood-drinker, which meant the sun gave him a vicious, burning rash that could be fatal if left untreated for too long. It also meant that he didn’t eat, not normally, and what he ate was closer to a single bite or so to taste instead of really eating - his digestive system was different.

That didn’t change the fact that Gabe was over three hundred years old, with a Creole grandmother and a runaway slave mother, and he had a rich knowledge of recipes. He often cooked for everyone - Jack and Genji, his employees, Lucio, Lena, and Jesse, sometimes even the support employees like Angela, Satya, and Sombra.

“How are you doing, Genji?” Gabe asked, pulling his molasses cake out of the oven. “Jackie is back in the office; he’ll be joining us soon. An’ you know where Lucio and Jesse are, don’t ya?”

Genji grinned, dropping down into the nearest chair at the table. “I’m so happy for Jesse and Hanzo,” he said, watching as Gabriel stirred the pot, the molasses cake cooling on a rack. There was meat already resting on top of the stove, and the smells were incredible.

“Jesse’s damn near useless, the ingrate,” Gabe muttered. He was naturally gruff, but Genji had known Gabe a long time now and recognized the fondness, the love, and the affection in Gabe’s voice. “He’s also all in a tizzy, and I think he’s trying too hard. You know what I mean?”

Genji hesitated. He did know what Gabe was talking about, but he didn’t want to think too much about it, because he was already worried and stressed that Hanzo’s dates weren’t working out perfectly. He didn’t want to think about trying too hard, because it meant Hanzo might  _ stop _ trying, and really, Genji had never seen Hanzo this happy or wrapped up in a partner.

From small doorway set at the back corner of the kitchen, which led to the other half of the house - the bedrooms and the small office, as well as Gabriel’s sewing room - came a thunk and thud. Gabriel grumbled something under his breath, stepping away from the food to go and retrieve Jack. Jack’s eyesight was almost nonexistent; even as he was bound to Gabriel, had been for the past hundred years, his health and lifespan extended, his eyes had slowly deteriorated. Now, he was legally blind; he often used his bond with Gabriel to see, when they were in the room together. But it meant that sometimes he didn’t see things left on the ground from Lucio or Jesse.

Genji popped up from the table and grabbed plates, cups, and silverware, pulling out some coconut-mango juice for Gabriel, the pitcher of iced tea that Jack preferred, and a can of soda for himself. He wasn’t a cook like Gabriel, or even a good amateur like Hanzo, but he knew how to ladle things into bowls. The meat would most likely be sliced and put on top of the food, but he did not know how to slice it in the correct way. So he divided the food into two bowls, readied the table as Gabriel walked through the door, Jack ambling behind him. The light-skinned man’s knees and shins were bright red - he must have tripped over something and gone down to his knees - and embarrassment dusted his cheeks just a tad. “Hey, Genji, you’re here early. Hanzo out with Jesse again?”

“They’re doing so well, I’m so happy for them!” Genji said enthusiastically, thumping back down into his seat and beginning to eat eagerly. “Hanzo’s asking me for ideas to go out, and thinking about what to wear - and remind me to thank Sombra for that choker, he loves it, he loves that it hides his antlers and helps project the body image he wants, it’s done  _ wonders _ for him. I didn’t even know she could do that; it must have been expensive!”

Jack grunted something from behind his spoon of the stew, and Gabriel, who was bringing meat to the table for the two of them, waved his hand. “Don’t worry about it. Sombra likes showing off, you know she does. It wasn’t hard. And if it will help your brother - we all know your worry for him. I’m glad things are working out.”

Pausing with his spoon in front of his mouth, Genji looked back and forth between the two of them. “You mean - you two? You bought that for Hanzo?”

He was a bit embarrassed on how his voice cracked on that question, and Jack seemed to hunch more behind his bowl, eating as if it was his one true focus in life. Gabe clicked his tongue, looking aside, but Genji could see the gentle flush to the darker-skinned man’s cheekbones. “It was easy, especially considering that I have Sombra on retainer. Don’t make too much out of it.”

Unbelievably, Genji felt tears pooling in the corners of his eyes. “That’s - I don’t think you understand - his anxiety is so much better now, with that, and he’s so much more confident, and he’s - I just - ” Overwhelmed, he stopped eating and covered his face with his hands, breathing slow and trying not to break down.

A warm arm curled around his shoulders, and Gabe’s gruff voice rumbled against his side. “I have more money than I know what to do with. Vampires aren’t good for much else. Stop disrespecting the food I made, and just eat. I made your favorite, with all those spices you like, so eat.”

Sniffling, Genji scrubbed at his face. For one moment, he leaned heavily onto Gabe, turning his head and nosing at Gabe’s chest, just rubbing his antlers against the thick shoulder and collarbone area, purring in the back of his throat. Gabe ruffled his short hair and then pulled back slightly, patting Genji between the shoulder blades.

With more reserve and care, Genji finished off his food. Gabe and Jack seemed to know that he didn’t want to speak anymore - when overcome with emotion, it was hard for Genji to form the words he wanted to say - and so they carried on a quiet conversation, mainly about the small races Jack had signed their juvenile up for, to train and prepare him for bigger races in the future. When both Jack and Genji were done their food, Gabe took their bowls to the sink, rinsing them off, and he tossed over his shoulder, “Alright, my turn - let’s move this to the couch? Or the bedroom, if you’re feeling up for it, Genji.”

“I’m always up for it with you, and you know it,” Genji replied, instinctually teasing, emotions more under control now and willing to set it aside. He knew that Gabe was not good physically or verbally showing affection, and so he often would buy them things - he had bought Lena an entire kitchen set, had shown up one night at Jesse’s small house on the edge of the ranch house’s property and dropped a bunch of bags down in front of Jesse before disappearing back into the night - the bags had contained everything Jesse could possibly need for setting up a small room to be an art studio. He’d given Genji a new laptop when his old one from school had crapped out, and had given Sombra a bunch of ingredients for her spells she’d been having trouble finding.

It was simply how Gabriel did things, and Jack had explained one night, while Gabriel was snuffling cutely against Genji’s back, that Gabriel had done a lot of bad and shady shit in the past, stuff that he still had nightmares about sometimes, and so he tried to compensate for all that by giving the people around them things that they wanted or needed.

Still, even with the prospect of sex on the table, it was still in Genji’s nature (trained in by Hanzo, honestly, but still, part of him now) to wash the dishes, make sure everything was clean and ready for the next day. He helped pick up the kitchen, put the (little) food left over into a small tupperware container, traded kisses with Gabe and Jack as they moved in the kitchen and cleaned up the area. Then they retired to the bedroom - a little early, but hey, they’d get to do date-stuff tomorrow, or later in the night if they wanted to go out - and Genji was pretty well-conditioned now to immediately get excited, body flushing, at the sight of the large bed and the grey and black patterned wallpaper, the thick, lush carpet a light cream cloud that covered the entire floor of the room, except for a small space in front of the fireplace, set in the corner of the room. The large armoire held many of Genji’s clothes items he had left here over the almost year he’d been in the relationship, so Genji carelessly stripped off his shirt and pants. His body dysphoria was nowhere near as strong as Hanzo’s, thank the gods, though he still sometimes had trouble if he caught himself unawares in the mirror. Still, his T had reduced his chest tissue - not by much, but more than with Hanzo - so they were smaller buds against his chest, and it was easier to ignore. He was rarely self-conscious about his body now, and was dropping his binder and boxers down as Jack finished folding his shirt neatly.

Gabe, at the least, was as careless with his clothes as Genji. He was naked, sprawled out on the silver-white sheets, dick soft. Until he drank from Jack, his body would not have the excess blood to adequately make him hard. Not that he couldn’t do a lot of… ahem,  _ other _ things. One thing Genji had come to realize over his relationship with Gabe and Jack was that Gabe didn’t put a lot of stock in direct reciprocation - Genji had always been taught from previous relationships that if you came, your partner had to come, but Gabe didn’t subscribe to that. So long as everyone was happy and there were cuddles at the end, Gabe didn’t always come, didn’t even always do anything besides using toys or instructions to bring his lovers pleasure.

“You always take so long, Jack,” Gabe grumbled, even as Genji crawled onto bed and flopped on top of him.

“You like watching me take my time,” Jack replied mildly, pants folded now and stripping out of his undershirt and socks.

Gabe didn’t reply - it was true - and instead kept his gaze on Jack as he reached down to Genji’s dick, lightly brushed his fingertips back and forth. Genji had already been wet, but now he was positively dripping, excited and eager. He straddled Gabriel’s thick thigh, hips rocking a little, and kissed and nipped at the underside of Gabriel’s throat, watching Gabriel’s fangs flash in the bright light of the room.

Still, Gabriel simply teased, reaching back to Genji’s ass, dragging fingers forward through his cunt and to his dick, long and slow teasing strokes as Jack finished undressing and meticulously picked up Gabriel and Genji’s clothes.

“Always so impatient,” Jack sighed, stepping forward to the bed. Genji loved the two men; they were almost a literal yin and yang sign, Jack whiter than white, hair pale and wispy against his scalp, so fine and white that it practically disappeared against his legs and arms, making his chest look almost smooth even if it wasn’t. His burly chest and legs were matched by Gabriel’s chest and legs, but where Jack was pale and hair was white, Gabriel was dark and his curly black hair was thick. Both men were scarred - Jack had a noticeable scar down his face that Genji had always privately believed had contributed to the loss of his eyesight - and Gabriel in particular was pretty torn up in his abdomen and chest area, as well as his thighs and upper arms. Genji loved tracing the scars with his tongue, liked following the map of them over Gabriel’s skin.

Whining in the back of his throat, he twisted to press a kiss to the corner of Gabriel’s mouth, to which Gabriel looked away from Jack and smiled down at Genji. “Always my impatient boy,” he growled, the rough purr of his voice vibrating against Genji’s chest.

With a teasing wink, Genji pushed up so he was sitting on Gabriel’s sprawled body, thighs wrapped around Gabriel’s thigh so that Genji’s knee was nudging against Gabriel’s thick balls, so that Genji’s weight was pinning Gabriel down. “Can you blame me?” he murmured, rocking his hips back and forth so his dick dragged back and forth against the scars and hair of Gabriel’s thigh. “Look at the beautiful people sharing a bed with me.”

“Jackie, you wanna pound the insolence outta him?” Gabe chuckled, putting a hand out to Jack.

The bed dipped to the side of them as Jack crawled into the bed, coming up behind Genji to peer over Genji’s shoulder, his eyes squinting to pick up the details. When Genji had first become a part of the relationship, he’d been nervous and squirmy about having sex in such a well-lit, bright room, but over time he’d become more and more comfortable with it, realizing the light helped Jack see what he needed to, helped Jack be more at ease. It hadn’t helped his exhibitionist tendencies, since now he could show off for his lovers, but then again, Lucio never complained, so Genji didn’t care.

“We haven’t been able to do that yet; what makes you think tonight’ll be any different?” Jack growled in Genji’s ear, making Genji shiver and his eyes flutter shut. Jacks hands went around Genji’s waist, directing Genji’s rocking and controlling the speed and the intensity, and Genji keened as he fought to go faster, go harder.

Beneath him, Gabriel wiggled to reach the night table, pulling out the bottle of lube - they’d have to buy a new one soon, Genji noticed absently, they were almost out - and tossing it to Jack. “Get the boy ready,” Gabe purred. “Knock him down a bit, bring him back down here. Let him rut against my thigh. There’s a good boy.”

Genji moaned, Jack’s large hand splayed against his back and pushing down - and Genji went, eagerly, ignoring the tingle of his nipples dragging against Gabriel’s chest hair to nab Gabriel’s mouth in a wet kiss, sucking on Gabriel’s tongue, groaning into Gabriel’s mouth as Jack slid his first finger inside. He let out a whine when the second finger went in, smashed his face into the juncture of Gabriel’s collarbone and neck, practically drooling against Gabriel’s skin.

“You gonna get in ‘im, get ‘im ready for me?” Gabriel grunted, gripping at Genji’s hips to hold his squirming thighs and abdomen still, his vampiric strength a match for Genji’s draconic traits.

“He’s always so eager,” Jack hummed appreciatively. “Positively sopping back here, sucking my fingers in, such a tight grip.”

The humiliation and just - clinical discussion of how eager and desperate for it Genji was - it made him flushed, embarrassed, and so turned on that he was drooling against Gabriel’s skin, whining and keening like a cat in heat.

“So noisy,” Jack tutted, and then he thrust in.

Genji’s mouth dropped open, a deep moan from his throat tearing out, and Gabriel chuckled darkly, rocking his hips up so his dick was dragging against Genji’s. “There’s our sweet boy,” he growled, voice dark. “Fuck him, Jackie, pound him into me, I want him  _ wrecked _ .”

Jack let out a gasp of his own, hunching over Genji’s back, thrusts going that much deeper, that much harder. He always followed Gabriel’s orders to the letter, and Genji and Gabriel had tormented Jack before with just Gabriel’s voice and feather-light touches - Jack was very auditory over visual, and Gabriel’s running commentary, the positive  _ filth _ pouring out of his mouth into Genji’s ear, had Jack getting more and more desperate.

Then Genji was coming, squirting and dripping slick over his thighs and Gabriel’s dick, clenching hard on Jack’s cock, and then Jack was sobbing over Genji’s back.

Gabriel’s eyes went red, and then he surged up, crushing Genji between him and Jack, hauling Jack forward and sinking his teeth into Jack’s throat. One or two drops got on the side of Genji’s face and ear, and this, too, had taken some getting used to, but now Genji came to crave that - that being  _ pinned _ , held tight and unmoving between Jack and Gabriel. Gabriel often drank from Jack while Jack was coming - something about adrenaline and endorphins. What it meant is that either one was plastered against his back, the other on his front, and crushing Genji between them, or both were above Genji, crushing him into bed and holding him down.

It was a bit awkward, but Genji was currently just floating, twitching, drunk on the feelings and oversensitivity. When Gabriel pulled back, panting, cock finally fully erect and thick, long, pressed against Genji’s hypersensitive, small dick, the two of them - Genji and Jack - collapsed down on top of Gabriel as well.

Not that Gabriel left them alone; he pulled out from beneath Genji, manhandled Jack face-down next to Genji so Genji could watch how Gabriel dicked the  _ brains _ out of Jack. He kinda wanted to participate, maybe kiss that lolling mouth, maybe shove Jack’s face between Genji’s thighs, make Jack lick him out, but quite honestly Genji didn’t have the strength to move. Gabriel was pumping into Jack, keeping Jack’s hips up with his hands because Jack was soft now, dribbling the ending of his relief from his dick, but Gabriel had stamina, had a bond with Jack so he could give  _ Jack _ some of that stamina, and as Genji got his strength back, Jack got hard again, moaning and whining like a bitch as he ground his face into the sheets, hands clenching.

Genji found he could find the strength to sit up, to watch as Gabriel’s thick muscles bunched and twisted as he dragged Jack’s hips up, pounded down, drove Jack deep into the mattress. With weak and barely coordinated motions, Genji shifted so that he could crawl closer to Jack, cuddled close, pressing sucking kisses against Jack’s mouth, tasting Jack’s tongue, making Jack gasp and whimper into Genji’s mouth.

It took a while - not that Genji was keeping track, considering that he was losing himself in Jack’s mouth and Jack’s taste, hips starting to rock again as he began to get desperate again - but then Jack was seizing up, his dick spurting sporadically, trying very hard to have Jack come again.

When Jack was done, down, boneless against the mattress and almost, practically, passed out -  _ then _ Gabriel pulled back, dick wet and dripping, and, grabbing Genji’s ankle, dragged him down.

Gabriel always got more aggressive when he just drank blood, and Genji was used to this part, too - to Gabriel wearing Jack out hard and fast, because his bond protected Jack from any damage, and then he would haul Genji towards him like a conquering king, hands rough and jerky and  _ mastering _ , and then spear Genji on his cock, drive Genji into the ground.

As it was, Genji yelped a little, then moaned as Gabriel’s hands gripped Genji’s thighs, wishboned them and pulled Genji almost entirely off the bed as he dragged Genji’s cock and boy pussy up to his mouth, lapping at the slick that was smeared over the entirety of Genji’s crotch and thighs.

Genji arched his head back into the sheets, thighs flexing and heels hitting into Gabriel’s back, and then he was coming again, everything in him going liquid and tense -

And then Gabriel very literally flipped Genji over, while the aftershocks of Genji’s orgasm was still lighting up Genji’s nerves, and slammed his cock into Genji’s still soft, still gaping ass, squelching into Jack’s cum already painting the insides of Genji’s gut.

The intensity of it, the sheer strength and control Gabriel showed, had Genji screaming out one more orgasm, such a weak and little one that was barely worth it, black crawling across his vision.

When he next opened his eyes, Gabriel was tugging the sheets down, wiping Genji and Jack up very cursorily, just enough to get any excess bodily fluids from making things too uncomfortable. Still, Gabriel wasn’t as thorough - Genji could still feel the sticky remains dribbling out of his ass, leaving little tracks down Genji’s skin.

But Genji was exhausted. Jack was already asleep. And Gabriel was crawling into bed, wiggling his way between Jack and Genji’s bodies.

Genji closed his eyes, and went to sleep.

***

Morning brought dried stickiness, tacky pulls at Genji’s skin, and he moaned in protest as he was moved.

“If you wake up, you could eat some of my blueberry and cheesecake pancakes,” Gabriel said softly.

Genji considered. Half-awake, he realized he was the only one in the bed - Jack always woke up early, always went to the gym. Gabriel never slept past eight in the morning whenever he went to sleep early; if Gabriel stayed up late, like normal, he’d sleep the whole day until mid afternoon. Vampires normally slept during the day in any case, so there was that.

Finally, Genji let out a huffing sigh and flopped onto his back. “ _ Fiiiiiine _ ,” he sighed, grumbling. “You need to make it worth my time, though. Weekends are my time to  _ sleep _ .”

“I know, honey,” Gabriel murmured. “You can still sleep. You don’t have to come out for breakfast if you don’t want any.”

“I wanna be  _ neeear _ you,” Genji whined. “But you’re not in bed.”

Gabriel chuckled, ruffling Genji’s hair and scritching at the base of Genji’s horns, making Genji purr like a cat, little chirrups vibrating in his throat. 

Breakfast was a quiet affair, though Gabriel and Jack were talking throughout. Genji was thinking about what Gabriel and Jack had said, their concerns about Jesse and, by extension, Hanzo. Genji was sure he knew what Gabriel had meant, when Gabriel had said that throwaway comment about Jesse trying too hard. Hanzo and Jesse needed to find their own style, because so far Genji could see Lucio in many of Jesse’s choices, a lot of Genji’s suggestions when Hanzo planned the dates. When he brought it up to Gabriel and Jack, he wasn’t surprised to see that they agreed with him, that they recognized that what worked for Genji didn’t work for Hanzo.

He just needed to encourage Hanzo to pick something new, something Genji hadn’t picked before, and foster some level of independence. It shouldn’t be too hard, right?

***

“It’s fucking  _ ridiculous _ ,” Genji grumbled three weeks later, slumped down in the chair in Lucio’s tiny car. “They can’t think up their own dates?”

Lucio chuckled, turning the car off and shaking his head. “I think you worry too much. Hanzo can take care of himself. Right now, we’re on  _ our _ date, and I wanna show you how to play hockey.”

Lucio’s teasing, though soft and gentle, still made Genji realize he had been obsessing too much about his brother’s comedy of dates the last few times he and Lucio had had date nights. Since he was looking forward to playing hockey, and Lucio was really good at playing hockey. He was, actually, really talented at a lot of sports, and Genji was a little envious about how easy Lucio seemed to be with his body.

The ice skating rink had only a few people on it - the players, he guessed, and Genji watched as they greeted Lucio easily. Lucio zipped into his pads and skates, and then was out onto the ice while Genji was still struggling with his own gear. Spinning up to the side of the rink, Lucio hung over the side, grinning wide, dreads wild over his back. “You look like a newborn foal,” he teased gently, as Genji wobbled his way to the entrance of the rink. “It might be that your skates aren’t laced up tightly. Do you want to check?”

“Would that mean I have to sit back down?” Genji laughed, a little breathlessly, as he gripped onto the side of the rink with fists, tight and terrified. “Because I don’t know if I can sit back down and then get back up again.”

Lucio chuckled, skating backwards a little, then zipping forward to cut ice in a sharp stop. Reaching forward, he cradled Genji’s face, kissed him tenderly. “It would keep you from spraining your ankle,” he murmured. “I don’t want you hobbling around my poor apartment. It’s a lot of stairs to get up, you know that elevator doesn’t work more than half the time, and you’ll spend so much time at Gabe’s ranch because it’s easier to travel around with a sprained ankle, and then I’d be all alone in my tiny apartment…”

Laughing, Genji wobbled and wibbled his way back towards the benches, calling back, “Alright, alright, I get the point. I don’t know how to really tighten it without it cutting into my skin, but fine.”

He nearly tripped twice, skates cutting into mats and making it difficult to actually walk, and finally collapsed onto the nearest bench. He didn’t know how to tie it any tighter, but he tried, yanking at the rented skates’ laces and grunting as he tried to thread the laces higher up. Looking up, he could see Lucio whirling around the rink. The other people there clearly knew him; they were laughing and chatting, and Genji was eager to join them, to do his best and try something new.

Gritting his teeth, he tied off the top of skate and pushed off of the bench. He still felt shaky and unable to walk right; too much pressure in a single line down each foot, and it just felt, it felt  _ weird. _

Careful steps brought him to the edge of the rink, and then there was a sharp noise behind him. Jerking back, he whipped around to see a balloon from some kid’s birthday party had popped - and then, when he tried to right himself, he suddenly found his balance completely gone.

He fell, down hard on his knees and unable to catch himself before he fell - and his arm hit the step up into the rink with a sickening crack.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you all for your patience!

“I’m  _ fine _ , Hanzo, truly I am,” Genji grumbled. “You don’t need to do… all this.”

Hanzo finished buttoning up the tight, constricting suit jacket, and fixed Genji with a stern glare. “I will not have you going back to work until at least you have had a month. That was a very serious fracture and all the magic in the world will not help your bones heal right if you do not give them time. I will be fine. It will only be for a short while.”

Genji looked so unhappy that Hanzo almost broke, almost went over to the sofa and hugged his little brother - but he didn’t. He had a job interview, an almost assured position, and he needed to go, and if he went to Genji now, got close enough, Genji would see the fine tremors, the way that Hanzo was, almost literally, shaking like a leaf.

But Hanzo couldn’t do anything  _ but _ go to this job interview. Genji had not only broken his dominant hand, but he had done it severely; when he had fallen, his entire body had snapped his forearm nearly in half. The bone had very clearly been pushed out of place - he had had a  _ second _ bend in his arm besides his elbow, and it had looked so wrong, so bad, when Hanzo had seen the x-rays he had nearly thrown up. The doctors had said it would take about two months to fully heal - that they were not sure why Genji’s bones seemed to be so fragile - and while Genji wasn’t working, they needed income. Genji’s work had assured him that he could have the two full months off to recover (a small blessing) but they wouldn’t be paying him while he was out. Hanzo needed to get a job, as soon as feasibly possible, and to do so he needed to go out into the world, interact with others, and pray that the illusion would hold. The longer it was used, the more it would wear away, and yet if it fell, Hanzo would be unable to wear the suits required for the kind of job - the  _ only _ job - he was qualified to do.

Genji had cursed the fact that he was a dragon, that his hollow bones would take so long to heal. Lucio had been terrified, wildly apologetic, and had been in and out of the hospital room for the past two days. Yesterday, when Genji had come home, all of Genji’s friends had invited themselves over to see him, which had stressed Hanzo out  _ so much _ \- but it had cheered Genji up, so he packed it away and shoved it down. Jesse hadn’t texted him once since the accident, and Hanzo was torn between being thankful that he didn’t have to go on any more disastrous dates, and missing Jesse fiercely.

On the way to the interview, Hanzo ran through his answers to standard interview questions, tried to figure out how he’d respond. He would have to hope that everything went well, because if it didn’t, he’d have to go through this nerve-wracking process  _ again _ .

Could he just… wait for Genji to go back to work? It was only a month. With judicious budgeting and cautious spending, cutting back on certain things, they could…

That was selfish. Genji had supported them both for so long. Hanzo had contributed nothing. He’d been nothing but a burden, doing nothing but watching television, cooking food and… just  _ nothing _ .

He was  _ nothing _ .

But now he could contribute. And maybe Genji could take it easier now if Hanzo had a job. Hell, maybe Genji would be relieved Hanzo wasn’t home all the time anymore. He had never brought Lucio or Gabriel and Jack to their apartment, and at first Genji had told Hanzo that it was fine. Genji liked to go out, would regularly go to clubs, would regularly go out and eat, never seemed to like to stay in the house. It made sense to Hanzo - he remembered how much Genji loved going out, being around others - but maybe Genji had just been catering to Hanzo’s neuroses.

He had to shove it away. Pulling into the company building’s garage, he stepped out of the car and pulled his portfolio into his arms. He had to do this. If he tried to just cut corners and stretch their budget, it would strain Genji and make Genji think he had to go back to work earlier, and being around kindergarten students would not in fact be better for Genji’s broken arm.

He needed to do this. He needed to show that he could, he needed to  _ be _ something more than just Genji’s brother, the freak who stayed indoors and had to be accomodated.

***

“You’ve been pretty busy,” Jesse said. “So, d’ya like yer new job? How’s Genji doing’? Bet he’s goin’ stir-crazy in your apartment.”

Hanzo kept his face pleasant as they sat down in the small diner. After trying to go skating - and ending up spitting blood - and trying to go into a nice restaurant, and trying to go on a small ‘cruise’ - the rowboat out on the lake had, well, hadn’t exactly gone as planned, either.

Hanzo didn’t know what to do. If he got to really pick a date activity that sounded perfect, he’d ask Jesse to come over, maybe cuddle on the sofa as they watched a movie.

But that was a cop-out. It wasn’t interesting, it wasn’t cool, and it wasn’t good date material. He needed to actually  _ do _ things.

So. A small diner, fewer people, outside of town instead of in-town. Hanzo made it inside this time, which was always a good thing, and they were sitting in the back corner, quiet and left to their own devices. It helped that Hanzo had been going into the office so often; he had to interact with a lot of people, over and over, and maybe he was getting inured to it. Maybe.

He was still on edge, but at least they could just eat something small and then be on their way. Maybe they could go to the woods again. Hanzo had loved that.

Jesse squinted at him. “A smile ain’t an answer. Everything goin’ okay? I’d think it’d be hard to suddenly have a routine and stuff like that.”

“It’s been… a new experience,” Hanzo allowed. “Genji’s been bored at home, and I haven’t been around much, so there’s not much he can do besides watch television while waiting for me to head home. It’s been… hard for him.”

“Sounds like it might be hard fer you, too,” Jesse murmured, taking Hanzo’s hand. “You wanna hang out this weekend? It’s important to relax, ya know.”

“I’d - ” Hanzo stopped, hesitating. He’d been out of the house, and he really just wanted to relax. And since he’d been out of the house, Genji was bored - he should stay home with him. Genji could do things for himself - and  _ did _ things for himself, more than Hanzo wanted him to - but he was bored so Hanzo wanted to cheer him up and make him happier, and it had been a while since they’d just had a day together to make breakfast and just hang out with one another.

“I know Gabe and Jack have been missin’ Genji, and Lucio’s been stressed ‘cause it had been his idea to go ice skating and learn hockey,” Jesse pointed out. “He could go hang out at their place, so you don’t need to worry about ‘im. An’ I’d like ta go somewhere with you, do something just you and me that we don’t need to worry about.”

It would be… mean of Hanzo, to refuse. Clearly, Jesse had been worrying about picking their dates - the picnic had been good, but the restaurant one had been bad. Still, it wasn’t as if Hanzo’s choices had been any better… but it was Hanzo’s turn to set up their date. Less pressure on Jesse, especially with how their dates had been going. And Genji would probably prefer to spend more time out, especially with Jack, Gabriel, and Lucio. Certainly they hadn’t had any real chance to do anything together at home - Hanzo came home tired every day, overstimulated and wrung out. He helped Genji finish up dinner, made sure that Genji wasn’t over extending himself with his arm and hurting it in any way, and that the various chores were done around the house. Genji could do the chores, of course, but Hanzo didn’t want Genji trying to dig the clothes out of the dryer, or reaching up high to get the laundry soap, or to try and fold clothes or make the bed -

And Hanzo needed the routines. He wanted that steadiness, even if it drained him. He was used to doing it, and he wanted to do it. He didn’t want that taken from him. He may be… you know, talked about at work, getting snide remarks, handling a lot of accounts and putting things into order because his two coworkers were pretty  _ dis _ organized, and things might not be great, but he could keep the apartment in order.

Licking his lips, Hanzo hedged, “I’ll have to ask Genji, of course. I do not want to leave him there alone.”

“O’course, makes sense,” Jesse said immediately, and tabled the discussion, moving instead to how Lucio had been making dramatic noises about dropping hockey, and Gabriel and Jack had been fretting, wanting to spoil Genji but not sure what he would accept or like at the moment.

Hanzo was distracted, and he knew he was distracted, but it had been after work and he’d been tired, stressed, wanting to put on a good face for the little mini date that this had been, and so when he returned home he stopped outside the apartment door and breathed in deep.

He could hear noise; someone was over. Probably someone to cheer up Genij, since Genji was so bored. He couldn’t really relax; he’d need to make sure everything was alright, and the guests were fine, and everyone was okay.

Breathing in slow, he unlocked the door and walked in.

There were four extra pairs of shoes in the entryway, and Hanzo pushed off his work shoes before stepping further into the apartment. On the couch was Hana and Lena, Lucio and Mei, the science teacher at Genji’s elementary school who was close friends with Genji. Hanzo knew of her - well, knew her, now, because she had come to visit Genji in the hospital.

“Hanzo! Hanzo,  _ nii-san _ , we ordered in some pizza and rented the newest Gojira movie!”

“Jurassic Ending movie,” Lena corrected, chuckling.

Genji shrugged with one shoulder, the other tucked tight in his sling and strapped still. His tail was waving happily, and his eyes were bright - much better than this morning, when he’d been limp and gloomy. Hanzo smiled and set down his messenger bag on one of the two chairs in the kitchen. He wasn’t going to take the choker off, even though he knew the longer he used it, the more the spell wore off. He’d have to contact Sombra, ask Sombra to renew it and pay for it to be done. While Hanzo’s job was nothing to sneeze at, it still wasn’t perfect, especially with the hospital bills, with the numerous takeout bills Genji had been doing because Hanzo had told him not to cook - to eat food that he’d made and set in the fridge.

“The miso soup is finished?” Hanzo asked.

“We did eat it, but you were out and you ate with Jesse, didn’t you?” Genji asked, twisting his torso to look behind the couch and into the kitchen. “We ate it and we were still hungry.”

“Yes, of course,” Hanzo said. He actually had been hungry; he’d been very nervous and had ended up picking at his food while at the diner, so he was still peckish, but he was glad that Genji had eaten the soup and liked it. Instead, he pulled out a water bottle from the fridge, replacing it with a bottle from the shelf. As he did so, he nabbed a small pack of crackers and disappeared into his room, closing the door behind him. There, he opened up the pack of saltine crackers and nibbled on them, trying to steady the roiling feeling in his gut.

He’d be fine. He just needed to… get in the groove of it, get used to work. He needed to ignore the small remarks, of how weird or aloof or cold he was, and get used to trying to both handle the workload - which he could do, it wasn’t as if he was incompetent - and make sure everything was streamlined and easily found. Filing the accounts and paperwork wasn’t super difficult, but there was no real rhyme or reason for the organization of completed accounts and paperwork, so much of Hanzo’s day was just creating a clear filing system and trying to make things neat. The other two in his department didn’t care about Hanzo’s system - in fact, fueled and continued the rumors that Hanzo was uptight and nothing more than a robot - but it was when they called him a fussy bitch or prissy that his breathing got tight in his throat, and his hands began to shake.

He’d be fine, he repeated to himself, setting the crackers down and opening the water bottle, drinking it down halfway before taking a breath, ignoring the tremble in his fingers.

He’d be fine, he told himself as he undid the choker around his throat and set it down on his desk, undid his binder and did his absolute best not look down, not think about the parts of his body he viciously hated.

He’d be  _ fine _ , he told himself as he crawled into bed in just his boxers, ignoring the weight on top, hair out of its topknot and loose around his shoulders, dragging the comforter up to his chin and forcing his mind to be still.

***

When his alarm went off in the morning, he woke up with Genji draped over his front, his hair poking into Hanzo’s mouth. He couldn’t just shove Genji off, like he’d do normally - Genji was sleeping facedown, which meant that his broken arm was draped against Hanzo’s side, and Hanzo didn’t want to jostle him too much. Slowly, carefully, he extricated himself, but the movements proved too much - Genji jerked awake with a start and then winced, freezing in place when he jostled the broken bone.

“Shh,” Hanzo murmured, running fingers through Genji’s hair and scritching at the back of Genji’s neck. “You don’t need to wake up yet. You still have five weeks off.”

Genji grumbled under his breath, and yawned before sitting up. “You never came out last night - you went into your room and then, that was it,” he mumbled.

“I was tired,” Hanzo murmured.

“Yeah,” Genji said softly. “I know you wanted a job quickly, but… you’re working so much. Maybe there are other options there, ones that won’t stress you so much.”

Hanzo bit his tongue, moving to pick up the choker. Genji watched it go on with solemn eyes. “I think the magic is wearing out,” he said quietly. “You can almost see your tail through it, if you squint hard and know what to look for.”

Another thing Hanzo would have to fix - at least he could get in contact with Sombra, without needing to ask anyone to connect him to her. As it was, he shook his head and pulled out the suit, getting ready for his work day. At least it was Friday - he didn’t have to go to work tomorrow.

“What time will you be home today?” Genji sighed, looking forlorn.

Hanzo hesitated briefly, then continued buttoning the cuffs of his shirt. “I should be back around five, like normal.”

Genji said nothing in response, and so Hanzo waited patiently, even though he really did need to get moving if he wanted to get to the office before the rush and have some level of quiet work before the rest of his coworkers came and made it almost impossible for him to be productive. Finally, Genji muttered, “Gabe offered to come and pick me up, drive me to his place. I could stay the weekend there, starting tomorrow.”

For a long moment, Hanzo said nothing. Saturdays had always been  _ their _ days, to sit in and relax with each other - but Genji was tired of sitting at home. It made sense. If Hanzo suspected Jesse had intervened, well, Jesse had thought he was helping clear the weekend for their date, and normally Hanzo wouldn’t mind Genji spending time away. But ever since he started working this past Monday, he had barely had any real time with Genji - every night, there had been people in the apartment, every morning he’d woke up early and left.

“I know you’ve been bored at home,” Hanzo said instead. “If you’re asking if I’m alright with it, of course. It’s been so long since you saw them, you must miss them very much.”

Immediately, Genji perked up. “That’s great! I’m glad, I didn’t want to take our day away, but I don’t know how you do it all the time! It’s so boring to be here, just lazing on the couch. There’s only so many episodes of Golden Girls you can watch in a day.”

Hanzo let the corner of his mouth tilt up, even as he felt his heart sink.

Lazing about all day - what he used to do. Clearly, Genji had believed Hanzo had been as useless as Hanzo had feared.

Finished with his morning routine, he went into the kitchen and began cooking up some rice and natto. Natto might not be Genji’s favorite, but he would eat it, and it was Hanzo’s favorite. He needed a little comfort right now.

***

“So where are we going today/” Jesse asked, voice bright and happy as he walked down the stairs with Hanzo.

Hanzo suspected Jesse had indeed suggested to Gabriel and Jack to come and fetch Genji, but Genji had been so happy in the morning with that to look forward to, he hadn’t even made a face at natto the way he normally would. So he let it go, and instead smiled faintly as he walked to the car in the parking lot. “I was thinking… maybe we could…”

He wanted Jesse to stay upstairs in his apartment, wanted to sit on the couch after a long week and just sit in Jesse’s lap, let something calm and mindless go on the television and just…  _ breathe _ .

But it was a date, not, not  _ lazing about _ and just sitting around doing nothing. So Hanzo smiled up at Jesse as they walked down to the car. “I was thinking we could walk through the zoo, see all the animals.”

Jesse gnawed at his lip, before shrugging. “I haven’t been to a zoo before, but we’ll try!”

That didn’t sound too promising, and Hanzo felt every muscle in his body tighten. “Would you like… to try something else? There’s an art museum down the way, we could go there - ”

“Let’s try the zoo, don’t worry about it,” Jesse cut in. “If it turns out bad, we could walk down to the art museum, it’ll all work out.”

Hanzo was skeptical - it seemed like bad luck dogged his footsteps in dating Jesse - and it turned out he was right to worry. They barely spent twenty minutes in the zoo before they were leaving and walking down to the art museum.

“Sorry. I guessed, I thought, maybe the animals wouldn’t like my scent, but there, I mean, I’d never tried. I was hoping,” Jesse apologized, voice sheepish.

“You don’t need to apologize,” Hanzo said, keeping his face calm and open because he wanted this to go well - he wanted so  _ desperately _ for this to go well - and he didn’t want Jesse to worry. The art museum was a little busier than the zoo - the zoo, being outside, had less people. Inside, they walked from century to century, but there were so many people, so many colors, so many  _ things _ and it was making Hanzo’s head spin, but he tried very hard to just focus on the piece of art before him, to just shut everything else out.

Still, as they went back to the car, Jesse put a hand on Hanzo’s back and frowned. “Sweetheart, you feel really tense - you okay?”

“I’m fine - just tired,” Hanzo said immediately.

“Do you want - do you want to take a step back? Take a breather?” Jesse murmured, brow furrowed, and Hanzo knew he was trying to check in, trying to make it easier for Hanzo, but Hanzo didn’t want that right now because it felt like pity, like catering to the weakness that was dragging Hanzo and everyone around him down.

Shaking his head, Hanzo got back into the car and closed his eyes.

“Darlin’?” Jesse asked, getting into the car and closing the door.

“I’m just tired - I’ve never, hah, it’s been a long while since I, since I worked in an office setting. I’ll get in the swing of things,” Hanzo said quickly, cutting off any options to keep talking.

The drive back, Jesse talked, but it was more subdued, and Hanzo could barely do more than nod and hum in agreement with everything. He knew his hands were shaking - and he could  _ see _ , through the illusion, the color on his nails, the length of his nails. The choker wasn’t working anymore, or if it was, it was fading fast, and now Hanzo was worried if his antlers had been showing, if his binder had been showing, and he couldn’t really think about this, anymore. He had to lock it down, take some time and breathe.

He just needed to not fuck this up anymore than he already was doing.

Pulling into the apartment parking lot, Hanzo parked and let out a crooked smile twist his mouth up. “I am sorry, Jesse. I don’t know… why my choices are always so bad. It was not - it was a good day, it was, but I know… it was not the best, and I’m sorry.”

“You ain’t got nothin’ to be sorry for,” Jesse said immediately. “Don’t you worry none. We still had a good time at the art museum, saw a lot of nice pieces, yeah?”

Hanzo assumed they did - the colors and pieces blurred and melded in his mind as he had gotten so overwhelmed with the amount of  _ things _ around him there - so he nodded.

“We’ll be okay, don’t worry. I know - I know Genji’s not back yet, probably won’t be back today, but maybe tomorrow, and we could, I dunno, try for a picnic again? That seemed to work last time, and I know it’s not a great thing to do, to repeat dates too soon, but I really feel like we had a good time there, and, I mean, I’ve not been doing so hot with the dates, so I wanted to really do something you had liked,” Jesse murmured.

Hanzo fiddled with the keys, standing on the sidewalk and looking at the car. “Well, you’ve been doing better than I have at this,” he said softly. “But I will - I will text you tonight. You have a safe drive back, and keep Genji happy and occupied for me, hmm?”

There was a look of confusion on Jesse’s face, but he nodded automatically. “Of course,” he reassured Hanzo. “We’ll take good care of Genji, you know that.”

Hanzo hugged Jesse and went up the stairs, concentrated just on putting one foot in front of the other.

He couldn’t move past it, move past how Genji thought staying at home was just wasting time, how he couldn’t do anything right, how he wasn’t right, he fundamentally was  _ wrong _ in some way, and his hands were nearly shaking so badly he couldn’t get the keys in the lock, and when he finally got into the door he couldn’t even - he could barely push the door closed before sitting down on the floor, crushing himself against the wall, trembling so badly that his teeth were practically chattering. He hated this, hated  _ himself _ , and he just didn’t know - this was only one  _ week _ , he had five more to go, and he couldn’t stop - how weak was he if he couldn’t even handle it for one  _ week _ \- he had to -

The doorknob twisted, and then the door creaked open. “Hanzo?” Jesse called out. “Hey, I had a question, darlin’ - ”

The door hit Hanzo’s thigh, and stopped. Hanzo - he hated himself even  _ more _ , because now here was Jesse, seeing him in this pathetic mess -

“Oh, darlin’,” Jesse whispered, door creaking, and then the door was closing and Jesse was kneeling down on the ground beside Hanzo. “Oh, darlin’, can I touch you? Is it alright?”

Hanzo shook his head no, shivering badly, curling into himself.

“‘Course, sweetie, we had a busy day, I’m realizin’, and I am - I was a moron, but we’ll work on communication because we gotta work this out together, we gotta build this together,” Jesse said gently, sitting down next to Hanzo - not touching, listening to Hanzo’s request, but Hanzo could still feel the heat from Jesse’s side. “But right now, what do you think would be good? You wanna stay down here? There’s a - there’s ambient light, and shit. I know you guys have blackout curtains in your room, yeah? We can cut down on some of all’a this. We can get things simple for ya. Or we can stay here, y’know, we can just breathe. Can you do that for me, baby? Can you breathe?”

Hanzo’s heart was racing so badly that it took him a moment to realize he was practically hyperventilating. He was going to pass out if he kept on like this; he had to get himself in control. He needed to make things okay with Jesse.

“Breathe in, soft and easy,” Jesse said easily, voice steady and calm. “Breathe, there ya go. Breathe. You got it. It’s as natural as can be. It’ll take care of itself.”

As Hanzo’s breathing steadied, he slumped back against the wall - and, then, feeling the warmth next to him and realizing he wanted that right about then, he slumped sideways onto Jesse.

“There we go. We got it, yeah? You c’n breathe, you’ve got this,” Jesse murmured, curving an arm around Hanzo’s shoulders, tucking Hanzo against his side. “You wanna move this to the couch? It’d be a lot more comfortable.”

It took Hanzo a few minutes, but he nodded weakly.

Jesse helped ease Hanzo up off the ground, and the two of them made their way to the couch. Once there, Jesse stretched out, then pulled Hanzo between his legs, tucking Hanzo’s head under his chin, one arm wrapped around Hanzo’s waist and held him tight against Jesse’s chest. “We’ll getcha some water in a bit, let’s get our breathing steady, let’s calm down.”

When Hanzo could finally breathe in some semblance of a steady breath, he didn’t know how much time had passed, but he was nauseated and had a splitting headache.

Jesse was running his fingers through Hanzo’s long hair, slow and easy, humming to himself as he stroked Hanzo’s head and scratched gently at the base of his antlers.

“Jesse?” Hanzo croaked.

Jesse rubbed his chin against the top of Hanzo’s head. “Yeah, babe? You doing better?”

“How - why did you - why are you here?”

There was a long moment of silence, and then Jesse sighed. “You were clearly havin’ a bad day, but you were - trying really hard to be happy. And that’s, I mean, we’re in a relationship now, yeah? Have been fer the past month or so. Which means if things ain’t going well, we tell each other, and I just, I wanted to tell you that. That it was okay to have - to have bad days. And, well, then you really  _ were _ havin’ a bad day. So, ya know. We help each other, you know? We make it work. Together.”

Hanzo sat up, feeling very dizzy and sick, and Jesse pulled back, got up and made his way to the kitchen. After a few moments, he was back with a cold glass of water, placing it on the coffee table in front of Hanzo.

“I want ya to know, Hanzo - Hanzo, no one expects you to do everythin’ on your own, okay?” Jesse said, sitting down. “You always need - y’ always need people. You - you had a good life, you know. It’s alright to be upset that it’s now out of whack. And Genji’s told us about ya, enough that I know he loves ya, Hanzo. Desperately, completely, an’ he may not see or understand things from your point of view, but he wants to. He wants ya t’ have the best, to get the best. And so do I. I wanna see you smile, see you happy. I want to be with ya, so badly that I’ll try everything and anything twice. But I also want ya to  _ talk _ to me.”

“And what?” Hanzo said finally, voice rough and shaking. “And say  _ what _ ? Say that I’m a miserable excuse for a dragonkin? That I - that I hide in the house, all day, and watch cooking shows because I can’t handle anything more interesting than that? That I am  _ not _ interesting, and unlikely to ever  _ be _ interesting enough to do anything, be anything, to you! To  _ Genji _ , to anyone! It - it is  _ ridiculous _ that I cannot do basic adult tasks. It is something that everyone else on this cursed planet manages to do, and yet I  _ can’t _ !”

Jesse caught Hanzo’s hands, gently curling his fingers around Hanzo’s wrists. “Sweetheart, darlin’, that’s  _ fine _ . It’s not fer everyone. It  _ isn’t _ . No one thinks less of ya. You take such care of Genji, of  _ me _ , and that’s all anyone wants - fer you to be  _ happy _ and healthy and  _ safe _ .” He leaned forward, pressed his forehead against Hanzo’s. “If it’s too much, tell us. We wanna help ya. What’s the point of having family if you don’t help one another when you need help?”

Hanzo realized he was crying, eyesight blurred, as he whispered, “It’s not - I’m a  _ burden _ , Jesse. I love my brother, but he - he does everything for me, and I do  _ nothing _ . I’m  _ useless _ .”

“You make me smile,” Jesse whispered. “Y’ make  _ Genji _ smile. You cook pretty damn well. You protect Genji, and care fer him. That’s not being useless, Hanzo. That’s not doin’ nothin’.”

Hanzo sat there, staring at the glass of water wavering before him, and then Jesse brought his thumbs up and wiped Hanzo’s tears away.

“I ain’t sayin’ it’ll be easy. A mindset’s a terribly powerful thing ta break. But if th’ job is stressin’ ya too much - quit. Gabe and Jack have space to hire someone on, if ya really want ta work, or you could just tell us. We’ll help you guys out. You guys ain’t a burden. An’ if you wanna do the job, if you wanna prove you can, that’s fine too. Tell me what you need, an’ we’ll work it out. A’right? There ain’t nothing we can’t do if we don’t put our minds to it.”

Almost involuntarily, Hanzo let out a weak chuckle “There are - so many contradictions in that sentence, I don’t know where to begin.”

Jesse huffed out a laugh, but then he was tilting Hanzo’s face up, pressing a soft and gentle kiss against Hanzo’s lips. “Any moment I’m with ya, Han, I love. Here in this apartment, out in th’ woods, or in a museum. The point of a date is to spend time with th’ people you like. If you’re tired, tell me. We could order pizza and watch shit on television and be done with it. An’ stop measurin’ yerself t’ Genji. The man’s a bundle of energy bottled in a firecracker. He’s got the energy of ten people. No one wants ya more one way, or more another. We just want ya to be yourself, and be happy.”

Hanzo scrubbed the back of his hand across his eyes and breathed out, long and slow, looked up at Jesse, and smiled.

Maybe it was okay to fuck up, if the people he knew around him wouldn’t let him fall too badly down that rabbit hole.

Maybe he could believe what Jesse was saying one day.

Maybe he really  _ would _ be fine.


End file.
